I was going to hoax call an ambulance
to West Newington Place, the alley,
and say I had found a body,
but it had run off by the time they arrived.
He was about 60 and had a top hat and jeans on
(he told me he was going to party ‘smart casual’,
but thought it meant separately).
He got up, muttered about landfill sites
and bloody Communists and wandered away.
You should be able to spot him no bother,
and no, this is not just not to make me feel better
after realising I may be a horrible person.
Words: Chris Lindores
Picture: Damon Herd

